Friday, November 11, 2005

Adventures in the Potato Trade: Finale

The Narrator: Yarael Poof kicked me out, so I figured I might as well narrate for the final showdown between Jar Jar and E'etooi. So, where was I? Jar Jar approaches the caravan door and climbs the steps in front of it. He then slips and falls back down again. He tries again, with the same result. The third time, he manages to get to the door and knock on it. E'etooi opens the door.
E'etooi: Who's there?
The Narrator: The door hits Jar Jar in the face and knocks him to the ground again.
Jar Jar: Ergh!
The Narrator: He grabs the potato lying next to his unconscious grandmother and lobs it at E'etooi, knocking the deranged Jawa over. He rushes forward to pick it up again.
E'etooi *clambering to his feet*: OW! What was that for?
Jar Jar: Usen mesa to helpen yousa taken over der galaxy!
E'etooi: Oh... right, that. Well, since you've managed to escape my control, let's see if you can escape my wrath! Heeheeheeheehee!
The Narrator: He holds out his left hand to invoke the power of the Dark Side of Cuisine. Jar Jar panics and hold the potato protectivly in front of him. To everyone's great surprise, it helps.
E'etooi: My powers aren't working? What the hey?
Jar Jar: Eh... Wait... Thissen issen an all-natural, uncooked potato, with der healthy skin still attached! Issen a powerful symbol of der Light Side of Cuisine!
E'etooi: Really? Cool. Uh... so... what do I do now?
Jar Jar: Well... yousa could surrenderen?
E'etooi: Never! Yeeaargh!
The Narrator: Jar Jar throws the potato at him again. He stumbles back into his caravan. Suddenly, a small spaceship drops out of the sky.
Jar Jar: Uh-oh...
The Narrator: He backs away, very quickly. The spaceship lands smack on top of E'etooi's caravan and crushes it, sustaining minimal damage itself.
Jar Jar: Okay... Hello? Issen anyone theresa?
The Narrator: A hatch on top of the spaceship opens, and a head pops up over the rim. A head wearing a home-made blast helmet. It is followed by another head. This one's blast helmet is patched up with sellotape.
Frick: Hey, buddy!
Jar Jar: Frick? Frack? Whatsa yousa doin heresa?
Frack: Well, we heard you were in trouble, and all us FooFers swear a solemn oath to help any of Fluke's friends when they need it - and you're... well... sort of Fluke's friend. So here we are: F.O.O.F., in all our glory, ready to assist you!
Frick: Besides, we can't find Fluke right now, so we don't have much else to do.
Frack: So, right! We're here, where's the danger?
Jar Jar *pointing*: Under yoursa ship.
Frack: ... Oh.
Frick: Maybe we should call 911.


Blogger F.O.O.F. said...

Yes!!! Another crushing defeat at the skilled hands of F.O.O.F.!!
I would like to thank all the other members out there who pulled for us and cheered us on. It was a tough fight but we managed to win the day! Thank you. Thank you all.
Uh…gee….where’s all the adoring fans? Where’s the screaming girls? Hmmm…

So eh, Mr. Jar Jar…you think you can do some of your famous magic to help us locate our illusive figure head Fluke?

4:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Whats the number for 911?


5:39 AM  
Blogger flu said...

Don't give in Jar Jar! Don't tell 'em!

uh... don't tell 'em that I'm... er... rather, that FLUKE is on planet Dingobaat!!


10:12 AM  
Anonymous redheadwithbedhead said...

You need two more posts to reach 100!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

If you don't care just tell me.

11:55 AM  
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check the amazing cave art on

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4:11 PM  

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